Twenty till but I wanted to state right now that once I hear the title and saw that first fuzzy promo (I fucking hate our reception) the first thing that jumped into my mind was an episode of a Batman cartoon that I cannot find because I FAIL AT BEING A COMIC GEEK. Five minutes till, now. Anyway, it's thee kids telling stories they've heard about Batman and each one tells a specific era, Adam West-era Batman, Dark Knight Returns-era Batman, etc. So I was thinking maybe this could be something like that, different people telling their stories and stuff but the more I think about it the less I think that it's possible. In part because Tall Tales was kind of like that but not exactly. I promise, the cartoon ep was really awesome and I'm explaining it badly.
So, back to Smallville.
It sucks ass. WHY IS IT STILL THREE MORE MINUTES, DAMMIT?
THEY MADE LARA A BLONDE? NO. HELL FUCKING NO.
His Mom's DNA? Ugh. I don't even wanna fucking know.
Previouslies: John, Colt, Azazel, Ruby getting shot, Crossroads Demon, Dean's deal, questioning Sammich, Dean questioning Sammich. Gee, I wonder what could happen here.
OOH FAIRLY TALES! I thought I saw Hansel and Gretel type figures in the preview last week.
HA! THE THREE LITTLE PIGS!
Oh God, I just snorted.
"One gust of wind and this'll blow away!"
Not by the hair is his chinny-chin-chin?
Aw, no gore. Sadface. :(
FROG! A PRINCE!
Dean almost ran over a Prince.
Aw, I know that Sandy's the Crossroad Demon in this ep and I saw the pic with Sam holding the gun on her. Fucking spoilers. Stupid asshats.
ROBERT PLANT! JIMMY PAGE!
HA! SAMMY'S GONNA HAVE TO SKETCH! Oh, this will be funny as shit.
FUCKING STEPHIE JUST CAME HOME AND HER AND HER MOM ARE BEING LOUD!
Oh God. That was so bad.
Heh, I love Sam trying to come up with something and failing.
Yep, Hanzel and Gretel.
Don't eat the food Ken. You're gonna die.
No such thing as a harmless old lady.
Fattening you up, Kenny.
Aw, no gore.
I love how they "casually" turn completely away from the state troopers.
Snow White, come on, be Snow White.
Heh, Sammy, you totally walked into that.
"Actually those guys were kinda chubby."
OOH! GRIMM BROTHERS! OOH! ILU SAMMY, MARRY ME!
...After Kripke, y'know.
WHICH ONE IS GONNA KISS IT?
XD ILU DEAN.
"Dude could you be more gay? Don't answer that."
SNOW WHITE, HI.
DON'T EAT THE APPLE, DEAN.
YAY. HE B SMRT!
Dude, how can you not know who Snow White is?
Cally totally was the little girl when she came in. Aw, he's trying to be nice to his daughter. How is the--
Little Red Riding Hood? Yep.
Oh wow, she's pretty.
OH NO. Evil stepmother. Fucking whore. Münchhausen's By Proxy.
HA! DEAN WATCHES THE OC! Also? I was totally just thinking about Mischa in The Sixth Sense.
"I'm gonna go stop the Big Bad Wolf. Which is the weirdest thing I've ever said."
...Doesn't a kiss wake Snow White up?
Aw, he saw her and thought he was hallucinating.
Hey, we haven't seen Sandy yet. It's gonna cliffhang, ain't it?
MOG SCISSORS, OH NO!
Aw, come on, wake up. That was supposed to wake her up.
Dude, Dean was thisclose to stabbing that dude right in the face.
Commercial. Fifteen minutes left. Totally gonna cliffhang with Sandy!Demon, watch.
STFU, DEAN! DON'T TELL SAM TO LET YOU GO! Sammy loves you, he's not gonna let you die. Whether you want to or not.
Sammy's gone. Going.
YAY SAMMY! SAVE YOUR DEAN!
EEEEE! SANDY! EEEEEEEEEE!!!!
She's so cute! She's so utterly tiny.
Buh? She knows Ruby?
SHOOT HER! SHOOT THE BITCH!
...DUDE. If the boss owns Dean's contract then does that mean that if Sam overthrows Lucifer (you know he's the boss) he owns Dean's soul/contract? Oooh, the possibilities!
YEAH! SHOT HER ASS DEAD!
FVBEYAIASCljk a WHY DID YOU END IT THERE?
Also something I was spoiled for, the whole "Jared's gonna fake!shoot his girlfriend in the head" thing. I'm gonna assume it was shocking on not just really cool looking.