BEWARE OF JENMAR. (clex_monkie89) wrote,

You know you're from...

Ganked from apocalypsos ...

1) go to and type in "You know you're from (your state here) if..."
2) pick out whichever list strikes your fancy and bold the ones that apply to you.
3) post it in an entry. Duh.

You buy salsa by the gallon.
**Hate salsa

Your Christmas decorations include a half a yard of sand and l00 paper bags.
**Nope. Jewish!

You think a red light is merely a suggestion.
**God that's true, nobody in ARizona can drive to save their frickin lives man!

All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October but clear out come the end of April.
**I have no out-of-state friends who visit.

You think someone driving wearing oven mitts is clever.
**Dude, you try grabbing leather/plastic/metal that's been sitting in 108 degree heat for hours, it's ridiculous.

Most of the restaurants in town have the first name "El" or "Los".
**I live in downtown Phoenix but yes, aside from the big chain places way too many do.

You think 60 tons of crushed rock makes a beautiful yard.
**It's hella better then crabgrass.

You've signed so many petitions to recall governors that you can't remember the name of the incumbent.
**I just registered to vote so...

You notice your car overheating before you drive it.
**I can practically tell when a car in the frickin parking lot is gonna overheat.

Your house is made of stucco and has a red clay tile roof.
**The 2 houses my family has had here were that. I thikn they're built that way to keep out the heat or something.

You can say "Hohokam" and people don't think you're laughing funny.
**And I can pronounce Peistiwa Peak (Just not spell it)!

You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water.
**Even our man-made lake is low on water.

You see more irrigation water on the street than there is in the Salt River.
**Again, downtown now but when I lived in the mid-city-ish not-'burbs I saw it.

You know a swamp cooler is not a happy hour drink.
**I love swamp coolers, AC is always better but a swamp cooler can be so much of a heaven send! I also know that the electric company actually can't turn off your power all the way in the summer because of the heat and the lack of AC/Swamp Coolers/Fans it would cause.

You can say 115 degrees without fainting.
**I hate the heat but I'm getting a little better at standing it (I still wear pants though like the fucking moron I am).

Every other vehicle is a 4x4.
**I don't own any but every other one I see is.

You can be in the snow, then drive for an hour and it will be over 100 degrees.
**I wanna live up north.

Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way in the summer.
**Every man and woman for themself!

People break out coats when temperature drops below 70 degrees.
**I don't but nearly everyone I see/know does, god 80 degrees and people complain about how cold it is and say they can't wait for it to get warm again (I shit thee not).

You discover, in July, it only takes two fingers to drive your car.
**Again the whole no car thing...

The pool can be warmer than you are.
**Screw pool heaters, I remember living in The Flamingo (Don't ask) and everyone emptying the ice machine into the pool so it wasn't so damn hot.

You can make sun tea instantly.
**One of my brother's best friend's Mom used to make Sun Tea.

You run your air conditioner in the middle of winter so you can use your fireplace.
**No fireplace but yeah, I knew someone who's Dad used to do that.

Most homes have more firearms than people.
**I can't tell you how many friends houses I wasn't allowed in growing up cause of that...

Kids will ask, "What's a mosquito?"
**Never heard that actually, but I guess it makes sense what with the lack of unclean water (Aside from Job Corps though, we're currently all being eaten alive by mosquitos.

People who have black cars or black upholstery in their car are automatically assumed to be from out-of-state or nuts.
**Well, isn't that obvious?

You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
**My Grandma has parked 3 blocks away from a place specifically because there was so much shade. I support her fully.

The AC is on your list of best friends.
**::Huggels AC::

Monday Night Football starts at 7:00 instead of 6:00.
**Dude all of our Prime Time is at 7:00, and we have the 10 o'clock news. The fact that Prime Time comes on at 8:00 everywhere else still seems weird as all hell to me.

You realize that Valley Fever isn't a disco dance.
**So sad...

You can finish a Big Gulp in 10 minutes and go back for seconds.
**Thirds and fourths too!

The water from the cold water tap is the same temperature as the hot one.
**Unless you're reaslly lucky and the water heater is broken and in the sahde and your garage is cold.

You can (correctly) pronounce the words: "Saguaro", "Ocotillo", "Tempe", "Gila Bend", "San Xavier", "Canyon de Chelly", "Mogollon Rim", "Cholla", and "Ajo".
**Suh-w-are-oh, ock-a-tea-oh, tem-pee, hee-la bend, san zay-vee-err, choy-uh, ah-hoe

It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is walking on the streets.
**Why the hell would you walk the streets? I mean side from going to the pool?

You experience third degree burns if you touch any metal part of your car.
**My hands are always varying degrees of burnt from metal. And my good foot is currently burnt from running outside in a fire dill yesterday w/o shoes on (I should know better...).

You know better than to get into a car with leather seats if you're wearing shorts.
**Unless you're suicidal.

Announcements for Fourth of July events never end with "in case of rain......"
**No chance of rain, but if it get's dry enough sometimes there are worries that the fireworks could start a fire.

When someone asks how far you live from a location, it's always in terms of minutes, not miles.
It honestly never occured to me to measure anything in miles. I'm a 1/2 hour from Metro Center, about a 15 minute walk from Central Station, 1/2 from Mesa (Certain parts)...

Everyone's smiling and talking about the great weather on rainy days.
**All the smart people are, but there's always that group of morons who complain becuase the rain is cold and they can't drive. I swear to god they act like it's a blizzard sometimes...

You have to explain to out-of-staters why there is no daylight savings time.
**I have no idea why myself except that it's a techinical thing.
Tags: meme

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